Why to transgender people judge transgender people?
This has been on my mind a lot lately. It’s bad enough that everyone runs around judging everyone else. Putting down, condemning, bullying, and treating those who are different in any way shape or form. But that is life. However, when people who are a part of the minority group who are on the receiving end of that start doing the same to others within that same community, there is a very big and very real problem.
Why would a transgender person who is persecuted, judged, bullied, and made to feel less than, do that to another transgender person? Because you don’t understand how they can identify as one thing, but act as another? Or because, even though you don’t fall into the societal norm, you judge others in your community because they don’t match up with your normal, even though they are a part of that same community? Really people!
There are no norms, everyone is different, and we are not called “Individual” for nothing. Each and every one of us are different on so many levels. Who, what, why, we do everything we do. How we think, process information, dress ourselves, and so on. Can’t you see that by doing this, you are no better than any other bully or judgmental bigot out there?
Take your judgments, ideation, beliefs, standards, and everything that makes you who and what you are, and use it for your own life. Don’t apply that to anyone, ever. Not your place. Not your business. Not you or your life. What’s the harm if someone does things you don’t understand? Don’t you do things that other people don’t understand? Is anyone on the planet better than the next person? HELL NO!
If I identify as transgender, male to female. I dress feminine, and do what most female’s do, but I still do masculine things. Is that wrong, or right or what? Is it even your business? NO! It isn’t.
If a transman chooses to wear makeup, and show off their business, and in your opinion they’re doing it for shock and awe to get the attention of others, is it your business? HELL NO!! Is someone with mental illness any better than someone who isn’t? You see where I’m going with this? Individuals identify as they do, and do whatever the hell they want to do, and are true to themselves, regardless of what your puny little limited mind thinks. Those apply to yourself, and you make a choice every day to keep those beliefs. That your choice. But DO NOT push your BS off on anyone else. It’s not your business.
Yes, I am talking about incidences that happen right here in our own backyard. People get a bug up their asses because they get all high and mighty. They start judging others, and all the sudden they have a resentment or hate or whatever toward a person or group of people. Let me tell you right now that it is all on you!! It has nothing to do with anyone outside of yourself. It does have everything to do with your own self-hate and lack of acceptance of self. I’m I judging you right now? I’ll bet you are, but I am not. I know the facts because I’ve lived on both sides of life.
Yes, you all know I was a meth addict in my 20’s and 30’s. A lot of you know I was active in 12-Step programs for 7 years, and was a part of a self-help center for many years. I learned tools on how to live life on life’s terms. I struggled. I took 2 steps forward and always fell back 5 steps. It has taken me 20 years or more to start really using those tools.
You want to know a secret? I’m not perfect. I screw up, I don’t always use those tools and I fall. I bitch and rant on Facebook sometimes (something I’m working on actively), and I want to leave my wife a lot, but she wants to dump me often too. But we don’t. You tell me I just need to grow up and get a job. Walk a mile in my shoes, and go over a year without even an interview, then come back and talk to me. You don’t know my situations, you don’t know who or what I am from seeing my posts on Facebook, and even if you are in my life once in a while, you really have no idea of who I am.
The difference between you and I is that I am aware of everything I say and do. Yeah, it may take me a few days, weeks, or months, but I’ve learned to make amends when I do wrong. I’ve learned to recognize the behaviors which no long serve a positive purpose in my life, and I work on removing them. It’s a slow process. But I’m still human. Just like you! Not better than you, not less than you, but the same as you. We both have a higher power who loves us equally, and sees us as the same, but on different paths.
The sooner you and everyone else on this planet realize this, the more love and happiness will grow. War, hate, and anger will slowly fade away. Wouldn’t this world be an awesome place to live if everyone were to learn to live life with an abundance of love in their hearts? I know I’ve become enlightened since doing that. And again, I don’t practice every day of my life. But I do pay attention, recognize unwanted behaviors, and once I get through the storm, I stand up, dust myself off, make amends, and move forward.
While we’re on the topic, let’s talk about amends. Why does a person even make amends? For the person they wronged? Because it’s a way for people to feel better about themselves? Because the person making amends thinks that doing so will make it so the person they are making the amends to won’t be mad at them any longer? Or, is it because the person making the amends is doing so because they recognize that they could have handled a situation differently, and by go about it the way they did most likely caused hurt feelings, anger or animosity to the other person. I don’t know about you, but that is the only reason I make amends. To me, making amends is simply taking responsibility for your actions and words, being accountable, and letting the person involved you are aware of how you could have handled things differently.
You don’t do it for the other person. You don’t do it to be OK with God. And you don’t do it for the other person. I mean you do, but whether they choose to accept your amends or not is on them. You are not trying to convince them about anything. You are not trying to get them to like us again. None of that is any of our business. We do it because we recognize, we do self -inventory, take responsibility, make the amends, and move on. The rest will work itself out without your pushing your will on everyone.
To wrap this up, and my point to all of this is simple. Love and accept everyone unconditionally. Show everyone respect, whether they give it or not. Realize that how others identify isn't up to you. You have absolutely no right to judge. If you identify as a lion, who am I to tell you different. Or to tell your friends that you are crazy? It's your reality and no one, absolutely no one has the right to tell you different.
Why would a transgender person who is persecuted, judged, bullied, and made to feel less than, do that to another transgender person? Because you don’t understand how they can identify as one thing, but act as another? Or because, even though you don’t fall into the societal norm, you judge others in your community because they don’t match up with your normal, even though they are a part of that same community? Really people!
There are no norms, everyone is different, and we are not called “Individual” for nothing. Each and every one of us are different on so many levels. Who, what, why, we do everything we do. How we think, process information, dress ourselves, and so on. Can’t you see that by doing this, you are no better than any other bully or judgmental bigot out there?
Take your judgments, ideation, beliefs, standards, and everything that makes you who and what you are, and use it for your own life. Don’t apply that to anyone, ever. Not your place. Not your business. Not you or your life. What’s the harm if someone does things you don’t understand? Don’t you do things that other people don’t understand? Is anyone on the planet better than the next person? HELL NO!
If I identify as transgender, male to female. I dress feminine, and do what most female’s do, but I still do masculine things. Is that wrong, or right or what? Is it even your business? NO! It isn’t.
If a transman chooses to wear makeup, and show off their business, and in your opinion they’re doing it for shock and awe to get the attention of others, is it your business? HELL NO!! Is someone with mental illness any better than someone who isn’t? You see where I’m going with this? Individuals identify as they do, and do whatever the hell they want to do, and are true to themselves, regardless of what your puny little limited mind thinks. Those apply to yourself, and you make a choice every day to keep those beliefs. That your choice. But DO NOT push your BS off on anyone else. It’s not your business.
Yes, I am talking about incidences that happen right here in our own backyard. People get a bug up their asses because they get all high and mighty. They start judging others, and all the sudden they have a resentment or hate or whatever toward a person or group of people. Let me tell you right now that it is all on you!! It has nothing to do with anyone outside of yourself. It does have everything to do with your own self-hate and lack of acceptance of self. I’m I judging you right now? I’ll bet you are, but I am not. I know the facts because I’ve lived on both sides of life.
Yes, you all know I was a meth addict in my 20’s and 30’s. A lot of you know I was active in 12-Step programs for 7 years, and was a part of a self-help center for many years. I learned tools on how to live life on life’s terms. I struggled. I took 2 steps forward and always fell back 5 steps. It has taken me 20 years or more to start really using those tools.
You want to know a secret? I’m not perfect. I screw up, I don’t always use those tools and I fall. I bitch and rant on Facebook sometimes (something I’m working on actively), and I want to leave my wife a lot, but she wants to dump me often too. But we don’t. You tell me I just need to grow up and get a job. Walk a mile in my shoes, and go over a year without even an interview, then come back and talk to me. You don’t know my situations, you don’t know who or what I am from seeing my posts on Facebook, and even if you are in my life once in a while, you really have no idea of who I am.
The difference between you and I is that I am aware of everything I say and do. Yeah, it may take me a few days, weeks, or months, but I’ve learned to make amends when I do wrong. I’ve learned to recognize the behaviors which no long serve a positive purpose in my life, and I work on removing them. It’s a slow process. But I’m still human. Just like you! Not better than you, not less than you, but the same as you. We both have a higher power who loves us equally, and sees us as the same, but on different paths.
The sooner you and everyone else on this planet realize this, the more love and happiness will grow. War, hate, and anger will slowly fade away. Wouldn’t this world be an awesome place to live if everyone were to learn to live life with an abundance of love in their hearts? I know I’ve become enlightened since doing that. And again, I don’t practice every day of my life. But I do pay attention, recognize unwanted behaviors, and once I get through the storm, I stand up, dust myself off, make amends, and move forward.
While we’re on the topic, let’s talk about amends. Why does a person even make amends? For the person they wronged? Because it’s a way for people to feel better about themselves? Because the person making amends thinks that doing so will make it so the person they are making the amends to won’t be mad at them any longer? Or, is it because the person making the amends is doing so because they recognize that they could have handled a situation differently, and by go about it the way they did most likely caused hurt feelings, anger or animosity to the other person. I don’t know about you, but that is the only reason I make amends. To me, making amends is simply taking responsibility for your actions and words, being accountable, and letting the person involved you are aware of how you could have handled things differently.
You don’t do it for the other person. You don’t do it to be OK with God. And you don’t do it for the other person. I mean you do, but whether they choose to accept your amends or not is on them. You are not trying to convince them about anything. You are not trying to get them to like us again. None of that is any of our business. We do it because we recognize, we do self -inventory, take responsibility, make the amends, and move on. The rest will work itself out without your pushing your will on everyone.
To wrap this up, and my point to all of this is simple. Love and accept everyone unconditionally. Show everyone respect, whether they give it or not. Realize that how others identify isn't up to you. You have absolutely no right to judge. If you identify as a lion, who am I to tell you different. Or to tell your friends that you are crazy? It's your reality and no one, absolutely no one has the right to tell you different.
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